Moving on U(p)?

Gene and I have lived in Carroll Gardens for over two years now and while we adore our neighborhood, we both agreed that we have outgrown our apartment. Now that there will be three of us, we will definitely want more space, more bedrooms, more bathrooms and most importantly more walk-in closets. There is one problem: we can't have our cake and eat it too. This puts us in a tough place where we have to decide between location, location, location and a large, new apartment. We are leaning towards something new since our current residence is pretty decrepit.

We went to check out an apartment yesterday in a deeper part of Brooklyn. In fact, so far from the city that they still haven't made paved roads down yonder. Ok, so maybe I am exaggerating but still, Avenue U might as well be in Uganda. It's not ALL bad. The apartment itself is nice and most importantly, extremely functional. The layout is very convenient as is the size and we would finally have our very own washer and dryer. Not only will we be able to wash our clothes via a handy dandy machine, but get this...we can also wash our dishes in a similar looking contraption. Currently this is a full time position being filled by my wonderful husband. The big downside of the apartment is that it will take our commute from forty minutes to an hour and ten minutes.

What to do? What to do? This is the beginning of many, many decisions. Before you know it we have to pick a stroller, a nanny, a pre-school, a college. I guess that one is easy - Yale if we end up living in Connecticut and Princeton if in Jersey. At least we got one decision down, but many many more to go.

Harder to Hide

I am only 10 weeks (and a few days) and already I am HUGE. My mom saw me wearing a fitted shirt the other day and she laughed, pointed at my belly and said, "That's EXACTLY what I looked like at 6 months." This would be funny if it wasn't so sad since the baby is the size of a grape.

My weight has also been fluctuating. On a good day, I am up about 1.5 lbs, but on a bad day probably about 18. Ok, so not that big of a difference, but easily three pounds. Normally, I wouldn't care about showing so early, but since I haven't told anyone (outside the fams) yet, it's pretty weird to walk around with a huge stomach pretending like nothing out of the ordinary is going on.

When I first found out, I wanted to run and tell everyone but I was convinced to wait until towards the end of the first trimester. Now that the time is slowly approaching, I decided to use the 'wave approach' of telling people. What is it you ask? Well, I just made it up but essentially I will tell a small group of people each week. I may start with one person one week, two people the next, and so forth. Why? The answer is simple. After about one week, the first person will be sick and tired of listening to me incessantly chat about my pregnancy, and it will be time to move on and tell the next person/people. This will ensure that for at least several weeks it can be all about me, me, me. Ahhh, pure genius!

Placentophagia

I was very hesitant about writing this post because reading it will require a strong stomach. You have been warned, so continue at your own risk.

Ok, you’re reading on so I guess you think you can handle this topic. What is it you ask? Placentophagia. You’re not going to have to Google it, because I am about to divulge all the details you’ll ever need to hear.

“Placentophagia -- the practice of eating the placenta -- has been observed throughout history in many parts of the world. In Western cultures, eating the placenta is often viewed as barbaric, but there has been a recent push among young mothers to carry out this practice after giving birth, due to the observance of multiple benefits to the mother's health.”

People actually do this?!?! Who was the first person that saw their placenta and said, “Hmm, that would go well with my chicken noodle soup.” There are a multitude of things we as humans can eat, but we don’t because some things are better left uneaten. I will leave it at that.

It gets worse...

“The most common (and, many claim, the most beneficial) method of placentophagia is to consume it raw in the moments immediately following childbirth.“

Most women I spoke to said they craved sushi, wine or brie immediately after birth. I don’t recall anyone saying they couldn’t wait to take a bite of their placenta.

And my favorite part...

“Odd as it may sound, there are literally hundreds of recipes available online and in folklore for cooking your placenta. When cooking the placenta, the meat must first be cut away from the membranes before preparation. Some of the most popular recipes for preparing the placenta include roast placenta (roasted in the oven as you would a pork roast), placenta cocktail (a drink blended with vegetable juices and ice), stew, and lasagna, and spaghetti, among others.”

Really? Placenta cocktail? What would that order sound like? Hey bartender, bloody Mary please. Make it with an extra shot of vodka, a dash of hot sauce, oh and don’t forget the placenta.

What has all this taught me? Mostly, that I should stay away from message boards on BabyCenter.

Quote of the day: There are many disturbing qualities about the show "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant". For me, the most frightening part is the general consensus among these women, regarding their unknown start of labor: "I thought I was dying".

UPDATE:
I wanted to clarify a few things:
1. I am not judging anyone who chose to eat their placenta or is planning to in the near or distant future.
2. Gene really discouraged me from posting this entry. In fact, he said, "I don't get it. What's the point of this? Are you just being gross?" Since I feel that I am a cutting edge blogger, I have no choice but to post this piece of atrocity masterpiece.

Round Ligament Pain

There are certain things about pregnancy that no one really talks about. Possibly because they are uneventful or maybe because not all women experience them. One of those things is round ligament pain. What is it you ask?

Here is the definition from BabyCenter:

Round ligament pain generally refers to a brief, sharp, stabbing pain or a longer-lasting dull ache that pregnant women commonly feel in the lower abdomen or groin. You may feel round ligament pain as a short jabbing sensation if you suddenly change position, such as when you're getting out of bed or out of a chair or when you cough, roll over in bed, or get out of the bathtub.

For some strange reason I tend to get the sharp pain when I sneeze in the middle of the night. Unfortunately, this is bad news for Gene. Because the pain wakes me up and is so unexpected, my reaction is to jump up and scream as loud as I can. Are you picturing this? Go on, picture it. Middle of the night, sneeze, followed by screaming as if you're being brutally tortured. The pain is incredibly sharp but also passes very quickly. I guess I would compare it to pulling a muscle. Nah, make that tearing a muscle.

In unrelated news, I almost tossed my cookies on the train today. I ended up having an internal conversation with God which went something like this:

Me: Please, please, please don't make me throw up on this train.
God: ...
Me: I swear just one more stop. Let me just make this one more stop without hurling.
God: ....
Me: Ok, 63rd street is just a few seconds away - we almost made it. You don't know how thankful I will be if you spare me this humiliation.
God: ...
Me: Phew, thank you so much. We did it!!!

Once I was off the train, the motion morning sickness subsided. If you're wondering why I am having conversations with God, it's because of: The Shack. I am about 2/3 of the way done - terrible book so far.

Mood: reticent (it's my word of the day)
craving: kosher dill pickle

Showing Already?

While laughing at something this weekend, I noticed a strange change in me. At first, I couldn't quite figure out what it was. The next time something funny happened, I noticed it again. It almost appeared like a mini earthquake. Something was shaking and it turned out that that something was ME! My stomach was actually shaking as I laughed.

I can't possibly be showing at 9 weeks! It simply can not be! I told Gene about my new discovery to which he replied, "Umm, isn't it a bit too early to show?" When you say that to a pregnant woman, what she actually hears is, "You are fat already?" I proceeded to stand in front of the mirror for the next 20 minutes and stare at my belly which pretty much looks as if I swallowed a grapefruit but forgot to chew it first. I wish there was a way to go from flat belly to looking pregnant and skipping that whole in-between sort of fat phase.

On the food front: ALL food is now disgusting. I began to loathe eating because nothing seems to interest me. Last night I had French Fries followed by a pickle. My diet is currently a rotation of frozen pizza, French fries or hot pockets. I need ideas that do not require cooking or looking at un-cooked food. HELP!

Mood: Itching to tell more people about the pregnancy

Chinese Baby?

I used to love Chinese food when I was in High School. In college, the craze died down and I had it occasionally. By the time I was out of school and working, I barely touched the stuff. It's not that I disliked it; I just never actually craved for it. What I did LOVE (especially when I lived in LA) the last few years was Mexican food. Chipotle was my best friend. I always thought that when I got pregnant I will be absolutely addicted to the stuff. Well here I am pregnant and what have I been eating the past few days?

Wednesday 8:23 PM EST - Shrimp and Broccoli with white rice
Thursday 7:48 AM EST - Eggroll with Ducky sauce
Thursday 7:09 PM EST - Sweet and Sour Soup
Thursday 9:21 PM EST - Wonton Soup
Thursday 11:43 PM EST - Fortune Cookie (which 5 minutes later met my best friend Mr. Toilet Bowl)
Friday 10:48 AM EST - Shrimp Lo Mein
Friday 1:15 PM EST - Orange Chicken

You get the idea....I like Chinese food. At first I thought that maybe my baby was a big fan of MSG, but turned out the place we ordered from did not add MSG.

If these cravings continue, I can kiss my dreams of being a petite cute pregnant woman goodbye.

Mood: Happy to be working from home
Craving: Sesame Beef and Vinegret
Milestone: 9 weeks tomorrow

Leave a comment and let me know what you craved (or hated) during your pregnancy

Sleepy...

Embarrassing things are already starting to happen to me and I am only 2 months pregnant.

Today we had a few gentlemen come in from the ANA (Association of National Advertisers) to present the benefits of their organization to our marketing department. Bill, the presenter, was incredibly engaging and had some funny and witty comments. He began the presentation by handing out his business cards, requesting that no one check the back of the card. What is the first thing I do? Of course, check the back of the card. Finding nothing unusual I continued to listen to his speech, only dozing off occasionally. The meeting was also accompanied by pizza, which further increased my sleepiness. Bill soon mentioned that some of the business cards were marked with an X, which meant that the person will receive a FREE conference pass valued at $1K. Luckily, my card was blank. As the meeting progressed, my narcolepsy kicked into high gear. Next thing I know, Bill stops speaking, pulls out another business card, marks it with an X and requests a co-worker to pass it 'to that young lady over there'. Unfortunately, I was the young lady and he explained to the marketing team that he had to give me that card because if one of their exciting conferences can't keep me awake, nothing can.

Upon getting back to my desk, utterly embarrassed I see an email from my boss asking about an Ad on the Yahoo! News site. It appeared to be infringing on our copyrights so I immediately sent an angry email to my rep. Only problem is ... I sent it to my GOOGLE rep! DOH!

Today is not my day!