Honesty is our policy

As you might have noticed, my family is not one to sugar coat anything.  The grandma posts alone should give a you a pretty good idea of the brutal honesty.  My mom and brother are no different. When they came over this weekend they made sure to notify me of some of the (ahem) changes in my body. 

Setting: Our apartment on a rainy Sunday afternoon. Mom and Peter (10 year old brother) came over to keep me company while Gene was in school.  I am wearing a fitted dress with tights.

Mom: Wow.  

Me: What? I grew?

Mom: Your butt!  It's HUGE!

Peter: Let me see.  Oh man, Anya, she's right, it's enormous.

Mom: Holy cow, it's REALLY big

Peter: Yea, yeah it's big Anya. 

Me: (trying to turn around and see myself in the mirror)  What do you mean it's big?  When did it get big???

Mom: I don't know, but it sure is HUGE

Peter: Yeah, mom is right, it just got big really fast!

Me: How can I not know about this?  Man Gene is going to hear from me!

(several hours later when Gene gets home)

Me: Gene, is my butt bigger?

Gene: (walking around me in circles evaluating) Hmm...

Me: It is, isn't it?

Gene: Well there is this part right here (points) that I suppose wasn't there before.

Me: Oh my god, I have been walking around with a huge ass, and no one shared this with me.  Do you know that I could have made some real money in a rap video by now or maybe sir mix-a-lot is looking to make a remix.

Gene:  Umm....well....I don't...ahh...hmmm

Anna: I can't believe my own husband failed to mention that my behind now has its own zip code

Gene: Look at the bright side....(cricket sounds)

Anna: What bright side? 

Gene: Umm....well....I....ehhh.....hmmm....

Anna: Sigh.